Life in the Hills is no day at the beach.

10:01
Sigh. The Hills is on. As is Weeds. I tried to make myself feel better by listening to Heidi Montag's leaked single "Body Language" featuring the rapping stylings of one Spencer Pratt, but it...actually, yeah, it did make me feel better.

Also tonight, I'm missing a personal television landmark. Right now on Showtime, MaryKate Olsen, my little water nymph, that tiny 88-year-old garden shrub with an insane nest of blond/black hair, the little baby orangutan herself, is on Weeds.

Look at her fly! See that combination of love, Starbucks, anorexia and amphetamines? It's making her soar like a retarded monkey-eagle! That didn't even make sense. I just realized now that I haven't eaten since yesterday.

I can't think about food or TV, it'll just make me sad. The truth is that I'm not that far away from being done, and I've only been here since 11am, so I should quit my bitching.

Lying naked on the floor...

7:06 Yeah, I've had "Torn" by Natalie Imbruglisomethin going through my mind since about 2:30. I don't know why, I haven't heard it in years, and I've never particularly been a big fan of it either. I haven't even been here for 8 hours yet and I was just going to start bitching about overtime, how sad is that? There are 5 patients in rooms, five waiting to see the doctor, and 1 that hasn't arrived yet. It's now 7:10. If he continues at this deadly pace, I may be here until after midnight. If he catches up, I think I could be out of here before 10.

7:22


Praise Jesus. Vanessa Hudgens and Zac Efron were spotted looking thrilled and eating McDonald's together. Is it just me, or are these the two plainest people in the entire world? How does the paparazzi even find them among other normal looking non-descript teenagers?
There are now 3 people in rooms, five in the waiting room, and one to left to arrive (who is now, might I add, late).

8:28 Time itself, appears to be at a complete standstill. HOWEVER, I discovered that although the hospital has taken off all of the standard Microsoft games from their computers, Microsoft Paint managed to stay. I remember taking Paint verrrry, VERY seriously back in the day. When I was 8 or 9 I was very focused on the first draft of an episode of Ghostwriter I was writing, and when I wasn't busy working on character development, I was making posters for said episode in Paint. Unfortunately, I wanted to name the episode after a haunted house that Lenni (with an i, bitches) and Jamal get stuck in, and for some reason the only address I could think of, was 21 Jump Street. My parents neglected to inform me that 21 Jump Street was a long running popular TV series, and that I looked like an asshole in trying to plagiarize that, subconsciously or no. I digress, but true story.
I'm so bored I could cry.




Wow.

There is no reason for this.

There's no reason for me to really be starting a blog right now/again. I used to write celebrity news on here, because I was a big loser. Now I just obsessively READ celebrity news, not write about it, obvi. Apparently several hundred people decided to read that blog in the two years between where I was writing in it, and when I deleted all of my old posts out of shame.

So now what? I know the world (read: Brooklyn)doesn't need any more bloggers, that's for fucking sure, but sometimes I have nothing better to do at work. And when a person finds themselves getting visibly irritated that TMZ.com hasn't updated since the last time they refreshed their screen, you know it's time to do something different with your time. If I get mad that this hasn't updated, I'll just slap myself across the face.


Me, slapping myself in the face and responding to the name of Susan.